Category: Friends

Have you ever stepped into a world so different from your own that it transformed your perspective on life?

My experience staying with the McAfee family was just that—a heartfelt immersion into American culture that illuminated the resilience and openness we can all share.

From July 12 to July 28, I had the incredible opportunity to stay with Ralph and LeeAnne McAfee as part of a co-serve servant leadership program. This experience allowed me to connect with individuals from a background wonderfully different from my own, and it was truly eye-opening.

Before this journey, my interactions were primarily within my own cultural community. The McAfees welcomed me into their home with open arms, treating me like family in a way I hadn’t anticipated. Their warm hospitality touched my heart; LeeAnne lovingly prepared meals for me, each dish a reminder of the familial love I cherish back home in Afghanistan. Yet, I was also introduced to American dishes I had never tasted before, igniting my curiosity about their culinary traditions and deepening my appreciation for their culture.

Despite the differences, I discovered common ground in our shared values of hospitality and kindness. Just as in my culture, where we honor our guests with warmth and respect, the McAfees embodied those same principles. Our conversations flowed effortlessly, revolving around cultural traditions—especially marriage and family—revealing striking similarities in our values, despite our different customs.

One of the highlights of my stay was hiking together to a breathtaking waterfall. The journey was not just about reaching the destination; it was about bonding over shared experiences and enjoying nature’s beauty together. We also celebrated my graduation from the program, a moment filled with joy and camaraderie as we took pictures and created lasting memories.

My cultural background shaped my perception profoundly. Coming from Afghanistan, I hold a strong sense of community and hospitality close to my heart, making me even more grateful for the McAfees’ generosity. Their kindness resonated deeply, reaffirming that the bonds of humanity can bridge any divide.

Overall, my time with Ralph and LeeAnne McAfee was not merely an opportunity to engage with a different culture; it was a transformative journey of personal growth. I learned the invaluable importance of openness and acceptance, recognizing that our differences can enrich our understanding of one another. This experience taught me that hospitality knows no borders, and that kindness and respect are universal truths.

I left their home with a deeper appreciation for American culture and a renewed understanding of the profound connections we can forge across cultural divides. It’s a reminder that, no matter where we come from, our shared humanity can create bonds that transcend any boundary.

Through the servant leadership program, I had the opportunity to stay with a very lovely host family in Oregon on July 20, 2014. Upon our arrival at the sisters church, we were greeted with a delightful surprise. Dinner was already prepared, and each table had name cards displaying the host family’s names and the students assigned to them. It was here that Kariam and I were introduced to our new host family in Oregon, the wonderful Mr. Mark Tyler and Ms. Karen Tyler.

We accompanied the Tylers to their home, where their hospitality instantly made us feel at ease. They had a charming dog named Princess Juniper Rosie. Although I was initially afraid of Rosie, the Tylers’ gentle reassurance helped me overcome my fear. They gave us a thorough tour of their house, making sure we knew we could make ourselves at home. Later, we enjoyed a cozy cup of tea together, sharing stories about our lives. They provided us with a separate room, complete with all the necessary amenities, ensuring our comfort.

The next morning, we had more time to converse over a delicious breakfast before they drove us to the church. That evening, they served us a mouth-watering chicken dinner, which reminded us of our own Afghan cuisine. This warm hospitality and delicious meals continued throughout our stay. One memorable morning, we even had the chance to enjoy breakfast outside, a novel and delightful experience for us.

The Tylers treated us with the utmost kindness and respect, making us feel like cherished members of their family. Our conversations covered a wide range of topics, and we found them deeply engaging. Mr. Mark Tyler, a man of great integrity, had an impressive collection of books. He often read by candlelight, adding to his intellectual charm. He also showed us his stunning classic car, a testament to his passion for vintage automobiles.

Ms. Karen Tyler was incredibly kind and thoughtful. She cooked for us, washed my clothes, and drove us to the church. We had many enlightening discussions about our respective cultures, and she showed a genuine interest in learning more. She actively listened and made us feel valued and respected.

One particularly enjoyable day, the Tylers drove us to the Dee Wright Observatory. The visit was a highlight of our trip, offering breathtaking views and fascinating insights into the area’s natural beauty. It was an experience we will never forget.

Our co-serve program concluded in Oregon on the morning of July 26th. Ms. Karen drove us to the church and, in a heartfelt moment, hugged me like a mother. She told me how much she enjoyed our time together, and I expressed my sincere appreciation for her delicious food and generous hospitality, making me feel as though I was in my own home.

As I reflect on my time with the Tylers in Oregon, I am filled with gratitude and emotion. Their warmth, kindness, and genuine care made me feel like part of their family. The memories we created, the conversations we shared, and the bonds we formed will always hold a special place in my heart. I now have a new family in Oregon, one that I cherish as much as my own, and I am confident that this beautiful relationship will continue to grow and flourish in the years to come.

When I embarked on my journey with ILD in 2010, it wasn’t just about studying; it was a transformative experience filled with opportunities to meet inspiring servant leaders. These individuals not only taught us about leadership but also motivated us to practice and revel in it. Every encounter with these leaders was like a breath of fresh air, invigorating my passion for leadership.

A few years into the ILD class, I found myself participating in student presentations and observing what they had learned in ILD. That day, several students from 2018 and a few from 2010, including the instructors, were selected for the Co-Serve program in Kazakhstan. Intrigued, I turned to my friend Jamshid Sultanzada for more details. Jamshid painted a vivid picture of Co-Serve, a program established by the remarkable Mr. Marshall Christensen. His mission? To instill the principles of servant leadership in young minds. Marshall’s life story is a testament to dedication, having spent his entire life educating and serving others. His approach was practical and deeply impactful, resonating with students at a profound level.

Inspired by Jamshid’s account, I eagerly submitted my request to join the program in 2019 through ILD Herat. However, fate had other plans. Instead of Co-Serve, I embarked on a Master’s Degree journey at KAFU. Upon arrival, I heard more about Mr. Marshall’s initiative, which left an indelible mark on me. Determined to pursue this path, I intended to follow up with ILD, but then the pandemic struck, and Afghanistan faced unprecedented challenges. Amidst the turmoil, I found myself fleeing to the United States.

In 2023, my persistence paid off. I reached out to ILD in Colorado, and they graciously enrolled me in the Co-Serve program. July 12, 2024, marked a golden milestone in my journey. On this day, I finally participated in Co-Serve, meeting the inspiring Mr. Marshall and his wonderful family. Alongside three fellow Afghans and a diverse group of Co-Serve students, I embarked on an unforgettable adventure.

The first day of the program was nothing short of magical. Mr. Marshall’s speeches were captivating, filled with wisdom about working together, believing in each other, and blessing one another. His words resonated deeply, leaving a lasting impression on all of us. Marshall and Daniel Ballast, the dynamic duo behind Co-Serve, have been nurturing this program for years. Daniel shared the fascinating origin story: in 2004, Marshall created a servant leadership course for students at KAFU. The impact was immediate and profound, sparking discussions about global leadership challenges and embracing new values.

Their collaboration expanded Co-Serve to other countries, and here we were, in July 2024, a diverse group of 22 students in Portland. We have had the privilege of visiting organizations with over 50 years of servant leadership experience. It was a golden opportunity to learn firsthand how these organizations embody servant leadership in their companies, communities, and the people they serve.

Reflecting on this journey, I am immensely grateful for the opportunity. The Co-Serve program has taught me that servant leadership is fundamentally about people, their needs, and fostering deep connections. It’s about valuing each other, lifting each other up, and creating a supportive community. This experience has been nothing short of transformative, and I am excited to carry these lessons forward in my life.

From the moment I first encountered Mr. Petrus, I knew he was a leader of remarkable vision and empathy. His dedication to nurturing and guiding aspiring leaders has left an indelible mark on everyone fortunate enough to learn from him. As I reflect on my journey with ILD, I am filled with immense gratitude for the pivotal role he has played in my personal and professional growth.

As a lifelong learner, my journey with ILD began in 2010 when I decided to pursue studies in leadership. Recommended by a few friends who believed in my potential, I was introduced to ILD’s core principles and invited for an interview. During the interview, I was asked two questions that have stayed with me ever since: “Who is the person that has influenced you?” and “Who is the person you have influenced?”

At the time, my proficiency in English was limited, and I struggled to articulate my responses. The following day, I received an email in February 2010 informing me that I had not been considered for the ILD 2010 program. This news deeply saddened me, especially as I had encouraged my friends to join ILD alongside me.

Determined to turn this setback into an opportunity, I composed a heartfelt email to ILD Director Mr. Petrus. I carefully chose my words, expressing my sincere desire to be part of the ILD program. To my surprise and delight, I was invited for another meeting with Mr. Petrus. During our conversation, he looked me in the eye and said, “You have impressed me with your words.” He handed me the application and invited me to the ILD inauguration.

Mr. Petrus became a pivotal figure in my journey, bridging the gap between my aspirations and achievements. He initially taught us Vision and Integrity classes, instilling in us key principles such as empathy, humility, stewardship, empowerment, and commitment to the growth of others.

Empathy, as I learned, is the cornerstone of servant leadership. It involves understanding and sharing the feelings of others, fostering a supportive environment where team members feel valued and heard. Humility, another essential trait, reminds us that leadership is not about exerting power but about serving others. Stewardship emphasizes our responsibility to manage resources wisely and act in the best interests of the team and organization. Empowerment involves giving team members the authority and confidence to make decisions, encouraging innovation and ownership. Commitment to the growth of others underscores the importance of investing in the personal and professional development of team members, ensuring they reach their full potential.

The year 2010 stands out as one of the best years of my life. During this time, I learned so much from all the instructors and classmates, forming many valuable friendships along the way. These relationships and lessons have continued to influence and inspire me in countless ways.

As I promised Mr. Petrus that I would strive to excel and be an exemplary ILD participant, I dedicated myself to improving my English skills and contributing passionately to every class. With unwavering dedication, I embraced the principles of servant leadership, focusing on serving my team and fostering a collaborative, growth-oriented environment.

In 2019, when ILD signed another partnership with KAFU, I was one of the first ILD graduates to apply and obtain my Master’s Degree. This achievement was a testament to the transformative power of servant leadership and the unwavering support of Mr. Petrus in 2010.

As I pen these words today, on the eve of July 12, 2024, I am about to participate in the Co-Serve program, which is part of ILD’s Servant Leadership initiative. This opportunity is a testament to Mr. Petrus, who opened the door to countless possibilities for me. Through the Co-Serve program, I will continue to practice and promote the principles of servant leadership, striving to inspire and empower others as Mr. Petrus has done for me.

From the bottom of my heart, I want to express my deepest gratitude to Mr. Petrus. He has taught me invaluable leadership skills and has embodied the qualities of a great leader: passion, trustworthiness, and kindness. His guidance has not only shaped my career but also enriched my life in profound ways.

Thank you, Mr. Petrus, for your unwavering support and for believing in me.

In the intricate tapestry of my thoughts, the central thread that unfurls my narrative is none other than the radiant presence of Jamshid Jan Sultazada. His name evokes a symphony of words and melodies, though they pale in comparison to his magnificence. Every moment spent in his company is a lesson, a revelation, leaving me longing for the harmony of his words.

My acquaintance with Jamshid Jan Sultanzada began in 2004, where our journey commenced side by side at AWCC and Institute for Leadership Development. Alongside my deep respect for him, I hold profound admiration for his esteemed lineage. A seeker of knowledge, he also embodies success and entrepreneurship, particularly in technology, where his tireless efforts speak volumes about his dedication to his people and nation.

In the constellation of virtues that adorn Mr. Sultanzada’s character, there are stars that shine brighter than others. He is a rare orator in the realm of leadership, whose words resonate deeply, leaving an indelible mark upon the soul. His speech transcends linguistic barriers, weaving tales of inspiration in both Dari and English, a testament to his unwavering commitment and exceptional prowess.

He is a benefactor from whom many have gleaned wisdom and growth, myself included. Over our 18-year acquaintance, I have leaned upon his wisdom and credibility in numerous endeavors, propelling me towards progress and elevation. As a friend, he is a paragon of virtue, offering solace, empathy, and support in moments of joy, sorrow, and adversity alike.

Mr. Sultanzada is a paragon of integrity, humility, and service, earning him a place of honor and reverence in society. His heart overflows with love and compassion, bringing light to even the darkest days. In life’s trials, he stands tall as a steadfast oak, embodying patience and resilience that rival the mountains, guiding us through the storm with his calm demeanor.

For Jamshid Jan, this epitome of compassion and boundless generosity, my wish knows no bounds. May happiness dance in his footsteps, pride swell in his heart, and success and joy accompany him on life’s journey. May our friendship echo through the ages, enduring for eternity in the annals of time.

Mariam White is a beacon of kindness and integrity in the IRC office. Her warm welcome on my second day was just the beginning of experiencing her genuine and caring nature. Beyond her initial friendliness, Mariam consistently demonstrates a remarkable level of kindness that permeates every interaction she has with others.

Her big heart extends to everyone in the office, creating an inclusive and welcoming environment. Mariam’s approach to communication is marked by sincerity, and she treats everyone with respect and consideration. She goes beyond the formalities of greetings, actively seeking to connect with both clients and team members on a personal level.

What sets Mariam apart is her unwavering commitment to help others. Her willingness to assist is not limited to certain tasks or specific individuals; instead, she opens her door of support to everyone in the office. This commitment stems from her genuine concern for the well-being of her colleagues and her belief in fostering a supportive community within the workplace.

In addition to her kindness, Mariam embodies qualities of integrity, honesty, transparency, and commitment. Her actions align with her words, creating an atmosphere of trust among her peers. Mariam is someone you can rely on, not just professionally but also on a personal level. Her honesty and transparency contribute to a workplace culture where open communication and trust are valued.

Mariam’s commitment to the team goes beyond the call of duty. She actively participates in building team cohesion and goes the extra mile to make a lasting impression. Her consistent smile reflects not only her positive demeanor but also her genuine passion for creating a positive and thriving work environment.

Her vision for a great working environment with pleasant relationships is not just a goal but a mission that she actively pursues. Mariam’s kindness is not just a surface-level gesture; it is the driving force behind her passion to enhance the workplace and make it better for everyone. Her commitment to humanity shines through in every action she takes, creating a workplace culture that stands as a testament to the power of compassion and teamwork.

In the end, Mariam White’s story is not just about a successful professional; it’s about a person who has discovered the profound impact of love in the workplace. As you navigate through her narrative, you may find yourself not only inspired by her leadership but also touched by the reminder that, in the midst of daily tasks and responsibilities, it is the love for our fellow human beings that truly makes a workplace extraordinary.

On November 16, 2022, at the initiative of Mallissa Watts, the IRC team was invited to watch an Afghan documentary at the Metreon AMC theatre in San Francisco. That evening marked the first time I met Mallissa, and our encounter was underscored by the profound sadness of the documentary. We engaged in a brief conversation before entering the theater with the rest of the team.

The documentary’s portrayal of the struggles faced by people during and after the war in Afghanistan struck a deeply emotional chord, especially for me, as I watched the film while physically in Afghanistan. The scenes depicting individuals behind the airport gates, desperately seeking evacuation, resonated with the harsh realities I was witnessing in my home country.

As the movie unfolded, the emotions intensified, and I found myself unable to contain my tears. Each frame served as a poignant reminder of the challenges and hardships endured by the Afghan people, bringing the harsh reality of the situation to the forefront.

Throughout the year of working together in the same office and department, Mallissa consistently demonstrated qualities that set her apart. Her kind heart, combined with a wealth of knowledge and excellent organizational and time management skills, made her an invaluable member of our team. It was evident that she approached her work with dedication and a genuine desire to contribute positively.

In the hustle of the office, Mallissa’s warmth was a constant presence. Whenever I encountered her, she never failed to greet me with a friendly “Hi, Khanzada.” This simple gesture created a welcoming atmosphere and showcased her personable nature. Her ability to connect with colleagues on a personal level contributed to a harmonious and collaborative work environment.

In our professional interactions, Mallissa’s passion for supporting refugees shone through consistently. Her commitment to facilitating their journey to start new lives in the United States was not merely a job duty but a heartfelt mission. Whether through brainstorming sessions, meetings, or casual conversations, her ideas were always thoughtful and geared towards making a lasting positive impact on the lives of those seeking refuge.

One thing that truly impressed me about Mallissa is her remarkable skill set. She exhibits a high level of organizational ethic, excels as a communicator, and consistently applies organizational principles when working with everyone around her. Beyond her professional attributes, Mallissa shines as an excellent mother and is exceptionally friendly.

What sets Mallissa apart is her positive mindset and remarkable attitude. She has an incredible ability to see the good things in people and is always ready to lend a helping hand to others. Her genuine willingness to support and uplift those around her makes her not only a valuable professional but also an outstanding individual.

In October 2023, Mallissa resigned from her position as the AIRS Resettlement Coordinator and encouraged me to apply for the role. Upon successfully passing the interview and being hired as the Resettlement Coordinator, Mallissa congratulated me with these encouraging words: “Congratulations!!! I was really rooting for you and admire your incredible work ethic, positive attitude, and kindness with both clients and colleagues. I can’t think of a better person for this role!”

Her words were truly energizing and inspired me to reflect on my experience working with Mallissa. She has been an exceptional leader and team player, consistently demonstrating a positive attitude, remarkable work ethic, and kindness in her interactions with both clients and colleagues. Mallissa’s support has been instrumental in my journey, and her example continues to shape my approach to the role.

In July 2022, I began my new career in the United States with the esteemed International Rescue Committee (IRC) in a short-term employment role that spanned three months. During this time, I had the privilege of connecting with a diverse network of individuals, and each day was immensely enjoyable. Within a few days, I had the pleasure of meeting Ms. Amina, who had recently been promoted to the role of Resettlement Coordinator.

My initial impression of Ms. Amina was that she possessed an incredible work ethic, a positive attitude, and a kind demeanor towards both clients and colleagues. As days turned into weeks, I had the opportunity to work under her supervision. It became apparent that she not only had strong leadership qualities but also a deep passion for fostering a cohesive team.

Towards the end of my initial assignment, another opportunity presented itself, and Ms. Amina encouraged me to take on the role of an R&P Caseworker. I was drawn to this job as it aligned with my desire to help refugees, and I admired Ms. Amina’s strong leadership and dedication to building a robust team.

Starting in this new role brought with it fresh challenges and increased responsibilities. I was fortunate to have Ms. Amina as my supervisor, always ready to answer questions and provide the support needed to deliver high-quality services to our clients. I worked under her supervision for nearly one year and half, during which time I found her to be supportive, courteous, knowledgeable, transparent, and unwavering in her integrity.

On September 15, 2023, an opportunity arose for the position of Resettlement Coordinator. I sought Ms. Amina’s counsel, and she encouraged me to apply, assuring me that I was well-deserving of the opportunity. After a successful interview, I was selected for the role and began my new journey as a Resettlement Coordinator within the IRC on 10/16,2023.

I am pleased to acknowledge Ms. Amina as a valued collaborator in my career at IRC. She is a remarkable team player, characterized by her integrity, punctuality, and the ability to maintain a positive demeanor even during challenging times. Her exemplary leadership skills, proactive nature, charm, organizational abilities, dedication, and competence make her stand out.

I am honored to write about one of my colleagues, Sydney Polich, with whom I have the pleasure of working at the IRC since July 05, 2022, Holding the position of IRC-HR & Admin Coordinator, Sydney’s wealth of experience shines brightly through her actions and demeanor, which consistently exceed the boundaries of her official title.

Sydney’s exceptional qualities create a tapestry of excellence evident in every interaction. Her genuine and approachable nature fosters an atmosphere of comfort and guidance, making individuals feel valued and heard. Her unique ability to prioritize both people and tasks demonstrates her commitment to cultivating strong working relationships.

However, what truly sets Sydney apart is her unwavering decisiveness. In critical moments, she demonstrates an exceptional aptitude for making well-informed decisions that not only enhance team efficiency but also foster a culture of trust and reliability.

Her interactions are refreshingly natural, as if she’s known each person for a decade. Her communication style is a harmonious blend of warmth, friendliness, and authenticity that creates connections reminiscent of conversations among close friends. Sydney’s innate people-centric approach and genuine interest in fostering connections empower open and honest dialogues, pivotal for building trust and collaboration within our team.

Sydney’s personality is an intricate mosaic of traits that leave an enduring mark on those fortunate enough to interact with her. From her approachable warmth that instantly fosters meaningful connections, to her empathetic listening skills that create a sense of belonging, Sydney’s multifaceted qualities are a testament to her character.

Her adaptable nature allows her to navigate diverse personalities and situations seamlessly, always preserving harmony. Sydney’s confident demeanor, coupled with her decisiveness, provides a guiding light for our team, steering us through challenges with assurance and poise. Her positive attitude and inclusivity elevate our collaborative environment, while her resilience in the face of adversity inspires us all.

Yet, Sydney’s confidence remains grounded in humility. She never seeks the spotlight, but rather aims to contribute to the success of our team through her deep understanding of her skills and a genuine desire to uplift others.

Sydney Polich’s presence significantly enriches our work dynamics. Her seniority extends beyond professional expertise; it encompasses her exceptional interpersonal skills that resonate throughout the IRC. We are privileged to have her as a colleague, and her profound positive influence touches each corner of our organization.

In acknowledging Sydney’s qualities, both as a mentor and for her impactful character, it’s evident that her contributions are invaluable. She embodies a beacon of positivity and inspiration, instilling a sense of value and support in all who cross her path. Her exceptional personality serves as a guiding light, enhancing our collective experience both personally and professionally. Sydney’s unwavering kindness, mentorship, and impactful character illuminate the path of success for all he team.

Reflecting on the incredible journey I’ve had with Karine, the Director of Gender Policy & Practice at Navanti, fills me with deep humility and profound honor. Her impact on my pursuit of gender equality and women empowerment in Afghanistan is nothing short of transformative.

Since the moment we connected in 2016, Karine’s unwavering dedication to supporting and empowering me has been an unwavering pillar of strength. Her expertise and passion for helping others are awe-inspiring, making her a beacon of inspiration in my life. Her investment in my growth goes beyond mere mentorship; she has taken the time to review and guide me in refining my writing and proposal skills, shaping me into a more effective advocate for change.

What sets Karine apart is not just her remarkable professional achievements, but her profound compassion and genuine commitment to making a positive difference in the lives of those she encounters. She has the rare ability to go above and beyond, extending a helping hand to aspiring individuals like me. Karine’s tireless dedication to promoting gender equality and social justice has ignited a fire within me to do the same.

In Karine, I have found not just a mentor but also a source of boundless strength and unwavering motivation. Her unwavering support has been the driving force behind my determination to create lasting change. Her compassion and tireless efforts to empower others have made her an exceptional role model and a true champion for women’s rights.

Her relentless pursuit of a more equitable world is awe-inspiring. Karine’s passion for uplifting communities and fostering gender equality is a testament to her remarkable character and leadership. Through her actions, she has become a guiding force, illuminating the path toward a brighter and more inclusive future.

Words cannot express the depth of my gratitude for the transformative influence Karine has had on my journey. Her exceptional work has left an immeasurable impact on the lives she touches, mine included.

With the utmost respect and boundless gratitude,

Khanzada